The 'Happy' New Year

I ache for the misery
and the pain
that used to be
in my heart

I long for the beauty
and the stillness
of the night

where life seems meaningless
and there's no beginning
to an end.

Dream A Little Dream

When I sleep, I always get very interesting dreams, ever since when I was just a little girl. I count it as a blessing. When life sometimes can be monotonous, dull or cruel, dreams can always surprise me and give me a different view of the world. People in your dreams don't expect things to make sense, things will just be as they are. Things just float, scene by scene. In a, you know, dreamy kind of way.

I was once a Rapunzel and one of my then cute cousin climbed up my hair to save me. I think I was five at that time. When I was seven maybe, there was an awfully bad storm and we (me and family) were trying to row our boat to safety (on cement), and our then very small boy neighbour (he was four) was standing scarily at the gate, blocking our way.

When I was in my early twenties I often dreamt of a big black figure, hitting and punching me. And once, a man in yellow songket baju melayu (with tanjak and all) forced me to take something, and also beat me up when I refused. (Man, I am a violent victim in those dreams).

Dreams, they reflect your subconscious mind, no?

When I was growing up, I sometimes get continuous dreams. Not having to wake up early during the holidays, and especially after finishing school and university, I curl up in bed when it's morning, to will myself to fall back to sleep and continue dreaming, because I am often curious enough to know how they will end. Heavy curtains, air conditioners, thick blankets. It was a cozy set-up.

But sometimes my mum would come into the room, pull the curtain to expose the glaring sunlight from outside and nag me to wake up.

Now I kinda wonder, if she was merely waking me up from my sleep or wake me up to reality.

When are you going to wake up, dA?

Detecting Lies For Dummies

How can you tell if someone is lying? Apart from the facial expressions, moving eyeballs, one side shoulder lifts, and all the other stuffs they highlight in the TV Series 'Lie To Me.' I mean, shouldn't we give them the benefit of the doubt? Shouldn't we at least give them some time to prove themselves?

I admit that, I almost always give people the benefit of the doubt. To the point until people tell me that I am stupid. Because why would people lie in the first place?

White lies? Okay, I do that too. But to deceive someone? My mind cannot grasp any reasoning for that. (right now. I might have done it in the past. I know I am not perfect.)

If we were to hire someone to work for us, is it normal to feel that people might cheat us? Would people really do that?

Should I stop reading Enid Blytons?

But I don't want to. I love my world.

Everyone else is fiction to me.

From Four To None

Four little teddy bears
sitting in a car
one jumped out
and now there's three

Three little teddy bears
eating lollipops
one chocked and die
and now there's two

Two little teddy bears
sitting in a tree
one fell down
and now there's one

One little teddy bear
walking down the highway
he got knocked down
and now there's none.

Open Day For Members Only

Dear members,

I'm happy to inform you that we will be holding a 3-day member's day starting tomorrow. All lifetime club members are invited to come and play. There will be many interesting games and prizes to be won. There's also a grand prize for the lucky draw, a gold jar full of honey.

We'll see you there.

Sincerely,
The President